People wonder why I’m not staying with my husband-Sangeeta Ghosh
Sangeeta Ghosh, best remembered as Pammi from Des Mein Niklla Hoga Chand, for the first time talks about her hush-hush marriage to a Jaipur businessman and her return to TV after a break
Seema Sinha (BOMBAY TIMES; October 21, 2012)
Where were you all these years?
I stopped working because of personal reasons. I wanted to spend more time with my parents and brother. I was out of touch with them although we were living under one roof. I have been working since I was 10. Today I am 36. I felt I wanted to breathe. And then, marriage happened.
Why was your marriage so hush-hush?
It was not hush-hush, it was a very private affair. I may be used to the media but my in-laws are not. Also, it wasn’t a big celebration in our family because my dad was extremely unwell. I rushed into marriage for my dad’s sake, but I don’t think he knew what was happening as he had lost his memory.
How did you meet your husband?
I met him outdoors during a shoot. Gradually, we became friends. He came down to Mumbai and met my family. He had actually not even seen me on television though his mother had. It was love at first sight for him; I just liked him. But then, as I got to know him, I felt here’s a person who understands me and could control me. I have never been controlled because I was always independent.
Did you adjust to marriage soon?
Initially, when he would want to know where I was going or who I was talking to…I would wonder why he was asking me so many questions. It felt strange. Even my parents had not asked me all this. But then, I realised he was not trying to control me, he was concerned. Suddenly, there was somebody in my life who was protective about me. I put pressure on him to get married in front of my dad. It was not that we didn’t want to tell people. We had planned another ceremony after a few months of marriage but it didn’t happen because by then I had lost my dad. We were in no mood of celebrations. And I didn’t feel it was necessary for me to answer anybody. I needed my space.
Post marriage, you’ve moved back to Mumbai while your husband lives in Jaipur. And there’s already speculation about a rift…
I know people feel that if I am married, why am I not staying with my husband? Nothing is wrong with my married life. It is a temporary arrangement, a matter of about two years… till the time a project ends. These days shows don’t go on for five to six years. But this is also my home, why can’t I stay in my own house after marriage? My husband comes and lives with me, I go to Jaipur and live with him. Luckily, my in-laws understand that after marriage you don’t lose your connection connection with your parents. My husband and mother-in-law were cool about my decision to return to work.
You seem to be fine with this arrangement…
Every month, for about 15 days, we are together either in Mumbai or Jaipur. I tell him that it is a very nice arrangement…much better than staying together forever. It is brilliant for independent, free-spirited people. I can have a life-long companionship now. We are married but we are longing for each other. It is very nice space to be in where you are missing each other most of the time. It may be a temporary arrangement unless I decide that I want to settle in Mumbai only for good.
What kind of roles would you like to play now?
I want to do mature roles and play strong characters. Comedy is also something I would like to try but later. I have got couple of offers but there is one particular show that has excited me.
You quit TV at one point for a film, Bhanvraa, that never released. Any regrets?
I don’t have any regrets. I don’t think it was a wrong decision, how would I know had I not tried at all? It was a great opportunity for me then. Now the gap between films and television is shrinking, it wasn’t then.